Be honest: have you ever met your neighbours?
In South Africa, where we pride ourselves on our friendliness and camaraderie, we tend to limit our social interactions to those in our inner circle rather than extending them to the people who’ve probably been living next door to us for several years.
One can attribute this “stoep-distance relationship” to our way of living, namely being surrounded by high walls mounted with motion sensors and reinforced with electric fences. Whether you’re residing in the countryside, a suburban gated community or a high-security penthouse in the city, the need for safety in response to Mzansi’s crime problem can cause a physical and social barrier between you and your neighbours.
Fortunately, it’s not too late to cultivate a healthy relationship with your neighbours, next door and beyond!
GET TO KNOW YOUR NEIGHBOUR STOEP BY STOEP
Whether you’re new to the neighbourhood or have been a lifelong resident, here are five ways you can get to know your neighbour:
1. STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION
Ever see your neighbour passing by while you’re fetching the mail, walking the dog or washing the car? This is the perfect opportunity to make their acquaintance and actually get to know the person beyond their “neighbour” title.
Greet them politely and introduce yourself. From there, you can chat to them about their day; ask them questions, such as how long they’ve been living in the neighbourhood or what their favourite places to visit in the area are; and bring up topics that may be of interest to both of you.
For example, if your neighbour’s rocking a Springbok jersey, you can gain some brownie points by being sympathetic when talking about the Boks’ recent 24-17 loss to New Zealand.
2. INVITE THEM OVER
Once you’ve both gotten to know each other a little more, invite your neighbour over for tea and snacks. If it makes you feel more comfortable, you can invite them out for coffee or lunch at a nearby café or restaurant – extra points are guaranteed if you eat out at the place they recommended!
3. HOST A GATHERING
Hosting a gathering is a great way to meet your immediate neighbours. It doesn’t have to be over-the-top or fancy; so long as you have enough chairs, snacks, beverages and maybe some music, it indicates your willingness to be friendly.
If you don’t have access to the neighbourhood WhatsApp group (yet), drop off the invitations in your neighbours’ mailboxes. Don’t let burglar bars and security gates discourage you from your mission!
4. JOIN THE NEIGHBOURHOOD WHATSAPP GROUP
According to Tracker, becoming a member of your neighbourhood WhatsApp group “is effective for sharing general updates, loadshedding schedules and to alert everyone of a possible disturbance.”
Additionally, you can share community news, ask for assistance – for example, “Can anyone recommend a good gardening service?” – or send each other holiday greetings. All in all, it strengthens your relationship with your neighbours and creates a sense of community spirit.
5. PROTECT EACH OTHER
When there’s trouble afoot, it’s good to know that you can rely on your neighbours for help.
Organise a Neighbourhood Watch, whereby you and your neighbours work together with local law enforcement to reduce crime in the area. This can be empowering and help your fellow residents feel safer.
Even offering to look after your neighbour’s house while they’re on holiday or assisting them during an emergency goes a long way in strengthening your relationship with them. That they may do the same for you makes it clear that they value this relationship, too.
LOVE THY NEIGHBOUR AS YOURSELF
It can be daunting to interact with your neighbours, but it’s definitely not impossible. So long as you’re polite and sincere in your interactions, treating your neighbours like you want to be treated, then you will see that the world beyond your stoep is actually a kind, warm and inviting place.
And it all starts next door.
HAVE YOU MET AND REGULARLY INTERACTED WITH YOUR NEIGHBOURS?
Let us know by leaving a comment below, or send a WhatsApp to 060 011 021 1.
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